Another 2 pounds off!!!!

Weight 101.5Kg Goal:70Kg Still need to loose: 31.5Kg

I have done the 5K in 43minutes 38 seconds...over 2 minutes better than last time. I am really happy about this but it still feels very difficult!!! I am struggling with the breathing and the uneven surface. I have only managed to do that with the help of PT that kept me going! I am really wworried on how I will keep going on the day by myself.I look like a real mess when I run!!!Imagine a very overweight, breathless, red faced woman trying to run. I hate it and I feel like everyone is looking at me in the park. There was a group of woman sitting at a bench and it was so unnerving!! The sensible side of me is saying who cares what people think? but in reality I do care, maybe it is the result of my upbringing? The importance of what people think.....
I have lost 2 pounds and it feels great especially as it looked like I was stuck at the same weight!! Food has been absolutely great but I am so worried about going on holidays next Friday. Last time I went to the same place I put on 6 pounds in 4 days. How did I do it? It was easy and delicious....I just cannot face putting on 6 pounds this time around so I am preparing myself to face the onslaught of food on offer and people insisting you try everything and keep putting things on your plate. What is it about families? They feel free to nag you about your weight and at the same time they just keep going at you with food until you have had everything on sight!

Only one Pound!!!

Weight 102.5Kg Goal:70Kg Still need to loose: 32.5Kg

The good news is that I did the 5k outside in the race park, it took 46 minutes. The aim now is to do it under 45 minutes.....The not so good news is that I have only lost 1 pound this week. It is really getting me down. I have been very good with food especially when everyone around me were stuffing themselves! This is the hardest when I have to keep going and the results are not coming....

Persepolis and fat and happy?

Weight 103Kg Goal:70Kg Still need to loose: 33Kg

Persepolis is a fantastic movie, I would highly recommend it. This is easily one of the best movies I have seen this year.

We have decided to get a second opinion overseas on the whole baby issue. We are going in 3 weeks. I am excited about going and scared if the news are not good. We are now running out of options...I just hope it is good news.

Finally just to clarify something: I was not happy at my starting weight however it does not mean that you can t be happy. I am not saying that you cannot be fat and happy I am just saying that I was not. In many the ivf was the trigger for me to lose weight but I have only made it so far by keep going after slipping up. In the past I would have just given up after slipping up, this time with PT s help and annoying comments I keep going....I am sure that I will not win a record for the time it has taken me but as long as I get to the destination...that is what matters

Why did I enter this race?

OK the good news is that I have done 5K outside today for the first time ever with PT, the bad news is that it did not go well. It took me 50 mins and 47 seconds. I am not that bothered about the time what I am really worried about is how difficult I found it.
Interestingly enough the difficulty came from the surface I was running on, I am the most uncoordinated person on the planet, so running in an uneven muddy surface was hard!!!
I kept thinking that I was going to fall.

PT was not impressed to say the least and for the first time I could see he thought I was not going to do it on the day alone....

I will do it on the day even if I just walk all the way but I will think twice next time before entering such an event.

I am going running outside again on Sunday with DH so hopefully I will get used to it.

I am back....and I have put on weight!

Weight 104.5 Kg Goal:70Kg Still need to loose: 34.5Kg

After a long absence, it has been the saddest 10 days of my life, I am back. How do you deal with bad news? Well I just ate and ate... I am trying to get back to where I was but I am struggling with motivation.
The gym has been hard to get back into it...How can I go from my best work out ever to my worst in 2 weeks? PT was not too impressed...and he keeps reminding me of the stupid 2 pounds I have put on. I had to do sit ups and in front of everyone in the gym yesterday....I felt so awkward! I am sure everyone was looking at the fat girl all sweaty trying to do sit ups....

At least if it stops here and I lose them quickly it will only be a bleep...

No ivf again this time...

Unfortunately it looks like another ivf cycle that has to be abandoned due to poor response...Difficult to take in, we are reviewing our options at the moment....We are converting this cycle to an IUI.
On top of that although the food has been very good lately I have been spending time imagining all sorts of food I would like to have I am having a fixation on chips with lots of salt and vinegar.Of course the proper ones from the chippie and not the oven ones.... Also Krispy Kreme donuts I am spending a lot of time at work thinking about them........

Of course the worst possible time will be the 2 weeks after the iui waiting to see if it has worked.